Skanksgiving

If you foresee loneliness being present this thanksgiving I have an option that might brighten your spirits.

I call it #skanksgiving…

Here’s the jist of my situation.

Thanksgiving use to be wonderful in my family.

A never ending supply of sausage balls seemed to pop out of the oven every hour from noon to midnight.

We played games and we played them HARD… no children allowed.

We always watched “It’s A Wonderful Life”.

Our family was huge and full of laughter and love… until this year.

The house that has held our clan of crazies every Thanksgiving was sold and is now inhabited by someone who was kind of a douche in high school.

I am blessed and I realize that so please don’t think me a whining brat. 

At least I have a family right? But everyone else with houses large enough for our squad belong to family members who have a million stops to make that day. So not only are we having it at our decrepit little volunteer fire department… But we’re not even having it on Thanksgiving!

I was having a difficult time dealing with this. Hurt and upset, I felt like my family was officially becoming dismantled. Thankfully I have a little cousin who was somewhat distraught too.

She is going through divorce and humiliation and the holidays are the only time I get to see her. Our past is trifled with drama and love… one of the most intense relationships I have with a human being. 

Both a little grumpy and lost, on this epic food coma holiday, we banned together. We’re going to celebrate #skanksgiving instead!

How do you celebrate it? Well I just made it up but hear with me and I’ll give you some steps.

STEP 1: MAKE NO PLANS 

It’s a holiday, you might even have it as a paid day off. If you’re not going to have a turkey showdown and try to look nice to impress relatives then what’s the point of a schedule? I know when I’m leaving to travel the 2 hours to see my cousin and the day I will return. That’s it.

STEP 2: SCREW YOUR DIET

You were going to anyways right? When surrounded by sweaters and fancy casseroles it seems easy to justify breaking your low carb diet. Do it anyways with #skanksgiving but this time eat that stuff you love more than life itself! Pizza, wings, Chinese or any place that is open!

STEP 3: EMBRACE YOUR MAMA JUNE FASHION SENSE

Being comfortable is key for #skanksgiving. I plan on having my pajama bottoms on before even getting in the car to travel. And honestly I don’t see me getting any fancier. If you do get wind of some awesome party or show that your lonely heart wants to attend then DO IT and just put a coat over your hermit attire. No one cares? You do? Okay well that’s different.

STEP 4: DON’T GIVE IN TO THANKSGIVING

Sure most places will be closed but start searching now for anything open or going on during your #skanksgiving celebration. Any chance to have fun and avoid boredom is highly encouraged! If you’re shaking up your usual holiday plans I’m sure that sneaky bastard we call depression might try to sneak in. There is stuff going on, find it!

STEP 5: GO A LITTLE CRAZY

Part of #skanksgiving is making memories and not letting yourself be stifled by the rest of the world’s pasta salad Instagram photos. One-up the world. Spend the money you normally wouldn’t spend. Do something uncharacteristic of you. But something you don’t need! Have those drinks you normally avoid! Meet those people you wouldn’t usually meet!

STEP 6: BE SKANKY

Now the term ‘skank’ is used all sorts of different ways. It can describe style, personality, life choices, odor…. but here is what I mean by being SKANKY for #skanksgiving. Kick up your heels. Be a little abrasive. Let your hair down and just don’t give a shit. Revolt against the holly homemakers and creepy uncles who want to sweep family issues under the rug. Be thankful and be honest. Life isn’t always peachy and just because my family decided to abandon tradition doesn’t mean I have to sit and be melancholy all day and feel like I’m missing out.

My life. My adventure. #Skanksgiving 

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